Building Self-Esteem

Hold family meetings to help your child feel connected, valued

Children sometimes feel isolated or “different.” They feel disconnected or anxious in social situations. They might also feel like failures. Such feelings lead to low self-esteem and make it harder to succeed in school.

Family meetings can help your child feel valued, capable and connected. In meetings, your child can learn to express what he thinks and feels. He can get much needed emotional support. Plus he can join in family planning and problem solving.

To start, announce you’re going to hold weekly meetings. Agree as a family on a time and place.

At the first meeting, ask family members to talk, listen and be supportive. Go around the table and ask all family members to speak about:

• Something positive they experienced during the week. For instance, “I felt really good about my spelling test.” Offer praise and encouragement. “Great job!”
• A problem they had that week. Listen and validate your child’s feelings. Get the family to offer solutions to the problem.
• Something they want to achieve in the coming week. Help your child come up with objectives and a plan of action to accomplish his goal.
• Their schedules for the next week. Let your child know if you’ll be working late. Ask about his after-school activities and social plans.

Source: Kimberly Keith, “How To Hold a Family Meeting,” About.com, http://childparenting.about.com/library/howto/htfamilymeeting.htm.